Here’s a little gem Joe shared with me from the interwebs. What if celebrities moved to Oklahoma?
Archive for the 'Funny' Category
I’ve always thought their ad campaigns were ridiculous and apparently some people that really care thought so too. I find it hilarious and am also impressed that some people still care about decency.
In case you’re having a hard time trying to decide who to vote for in the 2008 presidential election, my Amy from Amyville can help you out with her thoughts on Mitt Romney.
Yeah, I don’t think I want to have kids just yet because that would mess up my sleeping schedule.
My response:
Well, if that’s the case then I don’t think we’ll ever have kids cause I know how much you like your sleep.
Besides going partially deaf for one day Liz and I had a great time back in Iowa. We got to see almost the whole gang, I went to Harris twice, got some Whitey’s, saw Tyler’s new house, saw Josh’s new house and even watched an episode of Dr. Who.
One interesting moment was at Harris with my mom we ordered a pepperoni and pepperjack, the usual, and the waitress kinda looked at me for a moment. She said, “Pepperjack….cheese?” The next night Liz and I went with Josh and Erin back to Harris for round two. This time we got sausage and pepperjack. I was relating the story from the previous night and even pointed out the waitress. Our waitress for that night comes over, we tell her what we want and shes says, “Pepperjack….cheese?” It was pretty hard not to laugh. I looked across the table at Josh and almost started busting up laughing. Luckily I held it in.
What else comes in pepperjack? We looked at the menus and under toppings it says, “Pepperjack.” There’s no “cheese” after it or anything else. I felt like saying, “Oh, it comes in cheese? That sounds awesome. I’ll try that.” Unfortunately we’ve all grown up and we aren’t sarcastic and obnoxious to wait staff anymore.
I don’t have much hair on my head. I’ve been balding for the greater part of my life and I shave my head. Liz on the other hand has lots of hair. Not quite as much as she did as a kid, but still way more than I do. One of those things I had to get used to after marriage was finding Liz’s hair everywhere - on the floor, on the bed, on my clothes, on my backpack, on me, etc.
Our vacuum hasn’t been working very well for a while. I figured the bag was getting full. So I went online and found this deal where it was cheaper to buy 50 bags with shipping than it was to buy 15. Today I told Liz if she changed the bag (I didn’t want there to be a cloud of dust followed by me having a coughing fit) I would vacuum the house while she’s out with Lana. Liz changed the bag and I vacuumed. It still wasn’t picking much up.
On a hunch I flipped the thing over and realized the roller wasn’t even spinning. Then I saw some hair wrapped around it. So I turned it off, flipped it back over and started unwinding Liz hair. About 10 minutes later I had a pretty impressive pile…but the roller still wouldn’t turn. I then partially dismantled the thing and found there was so much hair wrapped around the drive shaft that the belt couldn’t stay on to turn the roller. I had to get my knife out and cut the hair off.
After I removed all the hair the vacuum works awesome - just like it used to. I left the pile on the coffee table for Liz to see when she gets home.
[14:47] Me: duder
[14:47] Me: you guys heading to the fest on friday?
[14:47] Bendog: no, man
[14:48] Bendog: jodi’s not into it
[14:48] Bendog: sadly
[14:48] Me: what?
[14:48] Me: did you tell her you’re filing for divorce?
[14:48] Me: sometimes when liz disagrees with me i tell her i just paid the water bill or rent
[14:49] Bendog: haha
[14:49] Me: it never works for me though
[14:49] Me: does jodi not love the movie?
[14:49] Bendog: she likes it ok
[14:50] Bendog: louisville’s not exactly on the way home
[14:50] Me: i thought it was just ok the first time i saw it
[14:50] Me: but the second time i thought it was freaking amazing
[14:54] Me: i told liz we need to roadtrip to the Ale8 factory some day
[14:54] Me: she didn’t seem too hip on the idea
[14:55] Bendog: women
[14:55] Bendog: not too hip
[14:55] Bendog: at
[14:55] Bendog: all
[14:55] Bendog: jk mf
[14:55] Bendog: but they really do need to be hip to our ideas
[14:55] Me: i know
[14:55] Bendog: because they’re effing great ideas
[14:56] Me: you know how in some work places
[14:56] Me: if you’re a jerk and harrass people
[14:56] Me: that make you take a class about not being a racist, etc
[14:56] Me: it’s like our women need to take a class about being more hip on our ideas
[14:56] Bendog: word
[14:56] Bendog: a support your husband’s effing sweet ideas class
[15:15] Me: i watched the dude yesterday
[15:15] Me: i should probably watch it again over the weekend
[15:16] Me: to comfort myself
[15:17] Bendog: i know i’d be crying
[15:17] Bendog: or at least on the verge
[15:24] Me: it was a pretty sad moment when i made the decision
[15:25] Me: it’s one of the few things i was looking forward to for the past 6 months
[15:45] Me: The BP in Upland sells Ale8 in the bottle
[15:46] Me: i get one every once in a while
[15:46] Me: they’re a pretty classy gas station
[15:46] Me: it’d be better if they had it on tap as a fountain drink
[15:48] Bendog: the only place i’ve had it on tap is at the factory
[15:48] Me: oh wow
[15:48] Me: that just sounds awesome
[15:48] Bendog: it was
[15:48] Bendog: free too
[15:48] Me: i wish i had a kegerator with ale8 in it
“The IT guy at my new job hunts and pecks…then he broke my computer.”
Tell me if I’m wrong, but this sounds exactly like several geeky cartoons I’ve read in my day. Freaking hilarious if you ask me.
Update:
“He jerked the mouse too hard and pulled the monitor cord loose…he seriously almost threw the system away b/c he thought it died”
Apparently Liz thinks I’m going to tell some really crazy story about her. Why would I do that? All I wanted to tell was about what happened Friday night.
So here it goes…..I wake up from a nap and Liz asks if I would go outside and get something out of her car. I object because I happened to be sans-pants. She then tried to tell me how it didn’t matter cause it was night-time, I would just be going out to my own driveway, we live across from a baseball diamond, etc., etc. I objected. So, Liz proved me wrong.
Hey, I got out of the house today! However, it was to the hospital again - where my doctor’s office is located - so I don’t think that really counts as ‘getting out’. I’m definitely getting better, little by little. What’s really frustrating to me in this whole situation is that after finding out my medicine had been screwed up last year and spending 6 agonizing months getting worse and worse, I finally got better. I was finally starting to feel like I was getting back to normal and enjoying life when this latest ordeal happened.
Some people have told me I just need to move to another state like Arizona. As much as I like that place (I was born there), I think I’m doing fine here in Indiana as long as things are “normal”. For now I think it’s worth sticking out. I at least have a competent doctor who’s pretty awesome to boot.
Liz went in with my to see the doctor today and he was asking about the apartment situation. We were telling him a bit about the discussion going back and forth and how we had pretty much been told I’m a special case with pre-existing conditions which is why….and that’s when Dr. D cut Liz off. “Pre-existing conditions? BULLSHIT!! If he’s not going to make the place livable for you to live then he needs to advertise - Equal Opportunity Housing Unless You Have Asthma.” And that pretty much sums up my pulmonologist. He tells it like it is and I definitely appreciate that.
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